Dealing With Anger

“The world is full of evil, and lies, and pain, and death. And you can’t hide from it. You can only face it. The question is: when you do, how do you respond? Who do you become?” – Agent Phillip Coulson

This morning, I was given some advice that immediately made me think of this quote again.

“Anger is not a bad thing. You were angry about an injustice, which you should be upset about. It’s what you do afterward that…”

I’ve grown up with two thoughts that I learned when I was very young:
1) Expressing sadness, hurt, is weak. It can be exploited.
2) Expressing anger is hateful, all it does is hurt people, and anger is never good.

But this guy… He’s like the A.C. to my Skye (the father-daughter version).


First he taught me that it’s okay, it’s even healthy, to express sadness.
Crying is actually a way the body releases stress, and holding it in is not a healthy thing to do.
Normal, loving people do not exploit sadness – they see it, and they want to help you with it, not use it to harm you.
They offer arms to hold you or a physical presence to sit with. They offer words and/or prayer to comfort.

Second, right here and during this past year, he has taught me the truth of righteous anger. That sometimes, it’s okay to be angry. Things happen in this life that are just so not right that we can’t help but be angry because of them.

What is important, is how you handle that anger. How do you use it? Do you let it control you, or do you allow it to pass – however long that may take? How do you act while you are angry? Do you take it out on the innocent, or do you express it toward the injustice that has been done? How do you express it? There are healthy ways to express anger… I’m still learning them, myself.

And what do you do afterwards? Who do you become?


Hannibal Lecter

You know what disturbs me? Fangirls of Hannibal. That is not sexy. It’s not supposed to be sexy. Mads Mikkelsen, sure; he’s quite dashing in his own way – but Hannibal Lecter? He’s evil, simply put. He fits into no psychological profile like “psychopath” or “sociopath” – he’s that level of evil. It’s generally acknowledged that he is incredibly intelligent, and yeah, he has great taste in everything from his suits, to the wine he drinks, the food he cooks (when it isn’t people), the music he listens to, and the art he experiences. But he is a serial killer. A cannibalistic serial killer. He is, in Mads Mikkelsen’s words, “the devil”. And that’s what I like about Brian Fuller and Mikkelsen’s portrayal – they acknowledge very clearly his interests in what makes us all human – and his own lack of humanity. But for the sake of everything on God’s green Earth, he’s not someone to look up to, in any way!

Don’t get me wrong; the character fascinates me. Always has, ever since I first watched “Silence of the Lambs” (when I was more than likely too young to have watched such a film). This fascination has nothing to do with the man, however. I don’t love what he does, I don’t love the choices he makes, I don’t love the type of person he is. It’s simply an excellentcharacter. The American Film Institute voted him the number one movie villian back when Hopkins was portraying him. He’s been, for a very long time, the bad guy everyone enjoys as a bad guy. “The villian everyone loves to hate.” He is a character who is “bad” – but he is incredibly complex in this. He’s not your regular baddie. He has layers, and he has a deep intelligence behind every move he makes. This doesn’t make those actions good, or reputable. His intelligence on it’s own certainly could be, but he misuses it in such a way that I’m hesitant to repeat “reputable” anywhere else in this post.

What prompted this post were some comments on the recently released Season 2 peek of Fuller’s “Hannibal” TV show. Here are a few examples from that and various other instances ‘Fannibals’ have gone a little too far:

  • “I’m very aroused by this.” (Seriously? Does this not disturb anyone else?)
  • “My body is ready.” (Numerous people have posted this – maybe it’s a joke I’ve missed. Doesn’t make it less creepy.)
  • A rather large amount of people ogling over Hannibal disheveled and bloody – which, by the way, appears to be during a scene in which he is attempting to murder Jack Crawford with a butcher knife.
  • All those reposts of that clip involving the door. (They know which scene I’m talking about.)

Maybe it’s Mikkelsen’s fault. Darn you, Mads, for being so good looking! Because he is, really – especially when he’s cooking (and if you ignore the blatant fact that it’s people he’s cooking up most of the time). Mads Mikkelsen has made Hannibal Lecter entirely too handsome. And that’s scary.

Here’s a picture to prove my point (and perfect! – no people parts in sight!):

All this being said, I am very much looking forward to the new season starting up in February in a very normal, non-squealing, non-ogling way. It’s an intelligent, dark, mystery that makes you question your own humanity sometimes. It digs into the psychology of human beings, it’s cinematographically beautiful (when it’s not super gross – which, kudos, for being able to gross me out), and, again, Mads Mikkelsen.

I’ll fangirl over Mads-the-actor. But I will not fangirl over Hannibal, and I will not fangirl over Mads-as-Hannibal. So, that’s me. Does anyone else enjoy the show for it’s quality, and not just over a pretty cannibalistic serial killer?

This photo kind of shows what I mean – it’s gross and disturbing, but that shot is beautiful:

> [By the way… here’s a link to that sneak peek. Because despite the reputation of some people, I do very much enjoy this TV show. Just please, don’t call me a Fannibal.] <


One of the things I’ve always been disappointed with in my photos, is that I never seemed to catch the brilliance of what my eye was seeing.

However! I was able to keep the true colors here really well. The flower really is that color orange. Really brilliant; I’m not sure where my housemate found it.

Coffee Time

Coffee Time

Until I have enough money saved up for a “real” camera (preferably a nice SLR), I’ve been hunting through the app stores to help me have quality pictures through my iPod.
I’ve recently downloaded a new photography app called “VSCO Cam”, and after only using it for a day, I have to say it’s by far my favourite app (so far!) It has a very easy to use interface, and it allows for more detailed editing than what I’ve found in other apps. Another great plus – it’s free!
I do recommend this for anyone else who uses their iProducts for photography – but if anyone has a different app that they like better, let me know! I’d love to try it out.

When you are a Stage Manager, there are many things that you are expected to do. In the shows that I have worked on, that sometimes included taking notes down for the director. When I’m working on smaller shows, I don’t always have an Assistant SM to help me out. So on those days that I’m running sound cues from the computer, checking actors lines, and making sure I have all the blocking recorded, the director is left to himself, my notebook and pen in hand.

Later, as I’m filling out the report for that night, I sometimes come across random little snippets of thought; moments where his mind went off track and the pen followed. Some nights, coming across these little “treasures” are what keep me reminded why I love doing what I do.

I am interested in trying out directing, myself, and I love that my University is providing me with a wide spectrum of  different directing styles. I’ve worked with this particular director multiple times, and while from the outside it seems crazy and chaotic, his thought process is really interesting. In my opinion, it is better for small casts – our large show was chaotic, sometimes, but the two-man show we did was very chill. He kept me informed of his ideas and why he made the chioces he did, and I loved being included in his creative process. Those two shows particularly were very different from one another in many ways, so to observe the same mind build two different performances was very cool.

On the other side of the spectrum, there is the director I have most recently worked with. She is very straight forward, knows what she wants, and knows how to communicate it. She is not strictly “all work and no play” – especially in the show that we had been working on – but she definitely runs a tighter ship. We get work done in our rehearsals, and at least 98% of the actors I know that have worked with her love her. She is great fun, but she is also structured, and structure is very important in rehearsals. Both of these directors are fantastic human beings, even being so different from one another. I’ve almost been blindsided, going from one side of the scale to the other in immediate succession, but it’s also been such a wonderful experience. The literal zero in-between time I’ve had on the two shows have forced me to see both their differences and their similarities; what I might do as a director, and what I might not.

I’ve learned a lot in my time at University, and I’m not quite done yet. I’m hoping beyond all hope that my last year can be spent working with the one director I haven’t, yet. He’s different, too – almost on a totally new scale – but he’s also one of my favourite people in the world. I’ve wanted to work with him since I first started at University, and in that time I’ve come to affectionately refer to him as “Papa”. I would love to be able to experience first-hand his directing process as well, the same way that I’ve been a part of the other’s. And to have worked with such different creative styles, I’ll be quite prepared for “stage managing in the real world”. 🙂

Theatre Zombies

This is what happens when you spend the evening with a bunch of your theatre buddies, watching a Canadian show called Slings and Arrows. We decide to create our own hashtag on Twitter: #TheatreZombies. This goes along with the hashtag we created a couple hours previously; #LifetimeZombieMovies.

For the #LifetimeZombieMovies, we individually Tweeted each title, things like Breakfast of Tiffany’s, PS I Love Brains, 10 Things I Hate About Zombies, and Eat Pray Brains.

Having more than 50 #TheatreZombie play titles, I decided to make a blog post out of it. So, here is my list of zombie plays. 🙂

Feel free to comment any additions!

1. Zombielet

2. Waiting for Brains

3. The Zombie Family

4. King Leer

5. Zombie on a Hot Tin Roof

6. A Zombie Named Desire

7. Zombies of Penzance

8. Zombiette and her Romeo

9. The Zombie Menagerie

10. Zombie in the Cathedral

11. The Brain Man

12. Death of a Zombie Man

13. Buried Zombie

14. Midsummer Nights Brains

15. The Bald Zombie

16. The Brain Affair

17. Damn Zombies

18. Tis A Pity She’s A Zombie

19. Zombie V

20. Way of the Underworld

21. An Ideal Brain

22. The Importance of Being a Zombie

23. Uncle Zombies

24. The Three Zombies

25. A Tale of Two Zombies

26. An Ideal Zombie

27. Zombie Expectations

28. Macbrain

29. The Real Inspector Zombie

30. Brains Off!

31. Dr Zombie & Mr Brain

32. The Zombie of the Opera

33. Zombie Rex

34. Peter Pan & the Zombie

35. Kiss of the Zombie Woman

36. Who’s Afraid of Zombies?

37. Guys & Zombies

38. The Marriage of Zombies

39. The Zombies Opera

40. A Zombie In the Sun

41. Sunday in the Park w/ Zombies

42. Endbrain

43. Brains Labours Lost

44. A Zombies Tale

45. Rosencrantz & Guildstern are Zombies

46. Les Mort-Vivant

47. Legally Dead

48. Beauty & the Brain

49. Zombie Boys

50. Jersey Brains

51. Forever Undead

52. La Brainheme

53. The Wizard of Brains

54. You’re a Good Zombie, Charlie Brain

55. Oh! Brains!

56. The Zombie King

57. West Side Zombie

58. Life with Zombie

59. 42nd Zombie

60. Hello, Zombie!

61. My Fair Zombie

62. Zombie of La Mancha

63. Smokey Joe’s Brain

64. Zombietrap

65. Crazy for Brains

66. Brainalot

67. Zombie & Hyde

68. Arsenic & Old Brains

69. Zombie Get Your Gun

70. For Zombies Who Have Considered Suicide When Brains Are Enuf

71. Othello, the Zombie of Venice

72. The Taming of the Zombie

73. Zombie III

74. Titus Zombicus

75. All’s Zombie That Ends Zombie

76. Much Ado About Brains

Winning Football is More Important than the Birth of Your Child

A Facebook page in honour of Brett Keisel’s beard posted this earlier today:
“According to a CBS report: Ben Roethlisberger spoke with the media today and revealed that he is dealing with a rare rib injury that could potentially be fatal if he were to be hit the wrong way. According to his doctor, the last known case of this type of injury occurred in 1998 with a rugby player. The rib is partially dislocated and if he were to be hit the wrong way, it could press against his aorta and kill him.”

Now, I don’t know whether the rumour is fact or fiction – but the rumour itself isn’t what bothers me. What bothers me is one of the responses to this post. Maybe the guy was attempting to be snarky, in response to other posters complaining that Big Ben was out. I don’t know if it was because his timing was completely off (none of the posts before his were negative), or he just doesn’t know how to ride the thin line of successfully expressing sarcasm over the internet.

In any case, he failed, and makes himself look like a Democrat. And by Democrat, I’m not talking about political ideals.***

Here’s what he said:

“Oh please. We all know they drummed this up because his wife is giving birth soon and he is selfish and wants to be there and spend time with his family instead of helping the team win games. No I in team Ben. Like it would just SO happen around the time his wife is gonna give birth that he’s gonna miss a bunch of weeks now. Don’t fall for this. NFL propaganda and lies.” – J. V.


I think there’s a line on what one can be sarcastic about, anyway. The man doesn’t want to miss the birth of his baby… that’s nothing less than honorable.

Or maybe I just need to admit that the world has become that depraved and people have stooped to lame jokes about football being greater than childbirth.

***Nothing against Democrats, by the way. But there’s another random question – why the ass and the elephant? I feel like this is something that should have been explained back in High School…

And here’s a link to an adorable photo of a baby Steelers fan!


Yup, it seems the issue with the rib is true.—1114/9e4e0200-c965-4640-8707-2abd0ecb3449

I completely agree with this – which is hardly a surprise, since my Twin wrote the original post. 🙂

The Artistic Underground

This movie really intrigues me. Main reason is because the story line does not scream romance but friendship, care and well, hate to quote the title but, unconditional love.

Don’t get me wrong, I love a good romance movie (sparkly boyfriends and teen angst NOT included). Sometimes, however, I feel like romance can be overdone. Boy meets girl. There is attraction (wow, surprise?).  They fall for each other. ENTER BIG FREAKIN OBSTACLE THEY MUST TACKLE BEFORE LOVE CAN PREVAIL. And then there’s a ring with “happily ever after” written on it. Baby makes three. You get the picture.  🙂

Haha, I realize that this post has a little bit of snark in it, but no matter how much I make fun of romance story lines, there is a little girl inside me that does truly cherish the classic love story of a man sweeping a woman off her feet.  I’d…

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This is an older post, I know, but I just came across it via my theatre’s blog page… sound advice, right here.


I have a confession to make. I was a theatre major in college (yes, complete with the snooty but appropriate “re” spelling). I’ll wait for you to stop snickering. Judson University (it was Judson College when I attended), the small liberal arts college outside of Chicago labeled the major course of studies as “Communication Arts” which is what I tend to put on resumes and bios because I realize that “theatre major” tends to elicit thoughts such as “Do you want fries with that?”

When I chose my major, I had no pipe dreams about becoming a professional actor. I did it because more than one wise adult had advised me that my actual major in college would have less impact on my eventual job search than having the actual degree. “Study what you love” I was told, “not what you think will get you a job.” I listened for once…

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Dearly Beloved, We Are Gathered Here Today To Get Through This Thing Called Life

It’s been a while since my last post… life.



But it’s all good. 🙂 To shorten everything up, my first almost-two-months of this year in college have been very awesome.
Right now we are running a show called “Angel Street”, written by Patrick Hamilton. It’s a student directed show – by Ginny! (who is an amazing person) – and I’m back in the sardine can, running the sound board.
What do I mean by “the sardine can”?


This is one of our 151 shows, which means the tech table is between the audience and the back wall of the room. It’s great visually – not so much on the comfort level. But that’s okay, because this is what we do, and we love to do it.
We’ve run two shows so far, and the last show is Saturday evening.

We are also working on another show to open later in October – “Henry V”. I’m really looking forward to this play – one of the new professors that was hired on is also a stage combat instructor, so there should be some good fight scenes to see….

There are a lot of other things going on as well, but they are all tentative, so I won’t say anything yet! This year is shaping up to be one full of lots of new experiences, challenges, and skills I never thought I’d have the opportunity to develop.

I’ll try to keep more up to date with my posts in the future 😛